I recently suffered a minor setback commonly referred to as Spring Break. My children deemed it necessary to take a little time off from the daily rigors of fingerpainting and multiplication tables; they wanted to do something. I tried to persuade them that it would be fun just to stay home and clean their rooms, and maybe watch the highly anticipated Tampa Bay Derby with the return of Street Sense battling the likes of the talented Any Given Saturday. The kids determined that that was not something.
Instead we went to San Antonio.
While Curlin was running away with the Rebel Stakes, I was at SeaWorld. And it was shortly after Shamu's performance that I pondered the possibilities: (1) Is there a relationship between horse racing and Shamu? and (2) Does the gift shop sell towels?
The second question was easily answered (Yes, and dry t-shirts are available, too, at reasonable prices) but the first hypothesis required scientific observation and exhaustive research. The results are listed on the table below:
Killer Whale and Thoroughbred: A Comparitive Study
180 lbs of herring, capelin, salmon, mackerel per day
hay, oats, horse feed
|Beyer Speed Figure|
Marine Animal Trainer, Sherri
Jockey Calvin Borel
|Rider Occupational Requirements|
academic coursework in zoology, marine biology, or animal behavior; strong swimming skills
lightweight; familiar with horses
|Odds of Winning the Kentucky Derby|
Therefore, one can conclude from the findings, that it is usually not necessary to bring a towel to a racetrack. And furthermore, Shamu is a longshot to win the Kentucky Derby.