Thursday, November 18, 2010

Irish Whiskey and Texas Politics

I AM NOT Sarah Palin!

I AM NOT Glenn Beck!

I AM merely a simple somewhat drunk opinionated Irishman Irishwoman that has something to say:

Global Gaming captured the hearts/minds/souls of the Texas horse racing faithful by simply allowing their hopes/dreams/visions of successful/prosperous/influential Texas horse racing when Global Gaming finally acquired/procured/snagged ownership of Lone Star Park. Fans and horsemen thought they hit the jackpot with Global Gaming, however it appears to be another case of the "malfunctioning slot machine" where the tiny warning label reads, "Malfunctions void all plays and pays."

Gary West of the Fort Worth Star-Telegram (motto: Hail the Red Head!) reported that Global Gaming requested its action items be removed from the Texas Racing Commission's agenda. The funny part was that the Global Gaming action items were about the only things on the TxRC agenda, other than donuts, coffee, and a rendition of "Texas, Our Texas" performed by the Blanton Elementary School 3rd graders. Anyway, the Professor insinuated political shenanigans - basically, someone besides me was irked that Rick Perry got re-elected.

Additionally, the Professor noted that Global Gaming and the Chickasaw Nation had done an "done an exemplary job at Remington Park" and were "committed to the horse racing industry in Texas", so why submit the application for license transfer at a later date?

Well, here's my Sarah Palin/Glenn Beck/Drunken Irishwoman diatribe perception: Remington Park already had slots when they acquired the facility. Global Gaming's in the gaming industry and obviously quite good at it, so it was in their best interest to improve the track and casino, notably since their expertise is casino and slots. "Horse racing" need not be their primary concern when acquiring the racetrack, only a nice beneficiary. However, Lone Star Park, at this writing, does not have a casino or slots. So why would Global Gaming commit to the Texas racetrack? Clearly their "guy[s]" didn't get elected earlier this month, so maybe the Slot Optimism is flagging somewhat - a malfunction. And now they loathe to pay. Furthermore, as Texas racing continues to struggle and bicker - and even if it hits its death spiral - Global Gaming can be comforted in the knowledge that Texas racing fans merely have to drive north ... just like all the other gambling Texans.

Sad.

Dumb.

I can see Russia from my backyard.

Tuesday, November 09, 2010

Breeders' Cup Turf Logic

Valerie, the famed writer of Foolish Pleasure applauded my successful selection of Dangerous Midge in the Breeders' Cup Turf but asked,
How the hell did you correctly pick Dangerous Midge?!?!?


Well, Valerie, I will gladly share with you my reasoning behind my selection of Dangerous Midge:

I remember Donativum winning the 2008 Juvenile Turf ...


And I remember Wilko winning the 2004 Juvenile ...

Thursday, November 04, 2010

2010 Breeders' Cup Selections

Crack open your piggy banks! Cash in all of your aluminum cans! Dig for loose change under the sofa cushions – and throw out the old popcorn kernels and stale Cheetos while you’re at it. The 2010 Breeders’ Cup World Championships is a mere day away, which means it’s time for Post Parade’s 4th Annual Magic Beer Bottle Breeders’ Cup Selection! This year we salute good friend and fellow blogger, John of Not to the Swift fame, and use the beer of his choosing: Bud Light Lime, proudly proclaimed “Instant Summer” by Hillside Liquor Store.
"My taste in beer is as quirky and eclectic as my taste in subject matter for the blog." [John]

Of note, I enjoyed modest success with my selections last year (5 winners, 4 others in the money). However, the Magic Beer Bottle, still gloating over its 2007 BC Mile Kip DeVille hit, fared poorly last year, Goldikova being its only winner. And who didn’t have Goldikova?

So, without further ado, let’s spin the bottle!

    2010 Breeders’ Cup Selections



    Sue

    Magic Beer Bottle

    Marathon

    Bright Horizon

    Alcomo

    Juvenile Fillies Turf

    Together

    Kathmanblu

    Filly & Mare Sprint

    Informed Decision

    Dubai Majesty

    Juvenile Fillies

    Awesome Feather

    Theyskens' Theory

    Filly & Mare Turf

    Midday

    Eclair de Lune

    Ladies Classic

    Life At Ten

    Acting Happy

    Juvenile Turf

    Mantoba

    Banned

    Sprint

    Wise Dan

    Smiling Tiger

    Turf Sprint

    Chamberlain Bridge

    Grand Adventure

    Juvenile

    Uncle Mo

    Jaycito

    Mile*

    Goldikova

    Goldikova

    Dirt Mile

    Here Comes Ben

    Hurricane Ike

    Turf

    Dangerous Midge**

    Behkabad

    Classic

    Zenyatta

    First Dude

    *Our successful selections last year. Let it ride!
    **I tossed Workforce - I don't care if he just won the Prix de L'Arc de Triomphe. Refer to the Dylan Thomas history lesson in 2007.

Be sure to stop by the TBA homepage as TBA members and a sundry to Twittering handicappers have posted their selections for the 2010 Breeders' Cup. Good luck!

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Plan B

Oh, the excitement! To think the Breeders’ Cup World Championships is a mere week away – next Friday and Saturday! But before that, there’s Thirsty Thursday at Rio Mambo with $2.99 margarita specials! But before that, there’s mid-term election on Tuesday!

So first things first: there’s some important politics to discuss, most notably here in Texas, and the hopes and dreams and visions of a 2011 Texas Legislature that will embrace slots!

It’s no secret that the ailing Texas horse racing industry would like to “expand the footprint of gaming” to “generate more revenue for the state and raise purse levels to improve the quality of racing.” So once again, the horse racing industry and horsemen associations are firing up the gambling lobby and painstakingly devising their plans as follows:

Plan A: Slots
Plans B: see Plan A

Well, it’s no secret there’s a lot of opposition to expanding the “footprint of gaming” in Texas Legislature. And our gun-totin’-coyote-killin’ Governor doesn’t support it either (read: veto). So, it would be in the best interest of the horse racing industry to devise an improved and more palatable Plan B.

And I’m here to help.

I have assembled a modest list of potential Plan B’s, all of which could generate more revenue for horse racing, as well as for the state. And all these proposals are VLT-free!

Plan B-1: Advance Deposit Wagering (ADW, or Account Wagering). Texas is the second largest state in size and population. 268,820 square miles. And there’s only 8 7 places where you can legally place a parimutuel wager. It’s 2010: There are iPhones, iPads, TiVo, direct deposit, electronic transfers, FIOS, video streaming, Skype, Toll Tags, debit and credit cards, etc. The last time I paid cash at a Sonic was June 2008. If I can [painfully] watch Cliff Lee get shelled by the Giants on a 30 minute delay courtesy of my DVR, then I should be able to wager on any race at any time while I’m at home, in my pajamas, doing laundry. It’s a no-brainer.

Individuals have griped about the Texas Lottery; it hasn’t lived up to expectations and has not provided the promised mega-funding. Well, here in the ADW model, Texas provides a controlled (read: Texas monopoly) internet betting exchange and enjoys their chunk of commissions on winning tickets. The racing industry supplies the product. It’s ridiculously easy money.

And Texas sells. TexasBet, TexBet, LoneStarWager, or something to that effect. I’d sign up. “Remember the Alamo!” and “That’s the way baseball go!”

Plan B-2: Strategically Placed Toll Road (SPTR. Or SPaToR. Oh, well, I’m workin’ on some kind of clever acronym). I hear the Texan Battle Whine over and over: “Texans pour into neighboring states to enjoy casino gambling. Texas is losing millions of dollars.” Well, one thing that Texas has been enjoying and implementing over the years is The Toll Road. It seems that every time a new road or express lane is constructed, there is a toll holding its hand. And the fees increase. However, Texans and their beloved motor vehicles just continue going about business (we all have Toll-Tags, which is nothing more than ADT – Advanced Deposit Toll – because we don’t really handle money … see Plan B-1). Anyway, I have provided in a schematic below, where the state of Texas could strategically place toll booths:


Of note, one would be in El Paso going into Sunland Park, NM (casino); toll booth on I-35 North going into Oklahoma (casino); and a toll booth on I-20 East into Shreveport, LA (many casinos). The funds generated from these toll plazas would be dispersed among highway maintenance, education, horse industry, SPCA of Texas, the Governor’s hairdresser’s annual gratuity, and the establishment of The Culinary Institute of the Cooking Impaired in Blum, Texas. An annual surplus would be expected.

Plan B-3: Lower the age restriction on gambling. “Texans pour into neighboring states to enjoy casino gambling” and so forth. Would you like to know what else New Mexico, Oklahoma, and Louisiana have in common? The legal age to gamble is 18. The legal age to gamble in Texas is 21. So let’s amend the Texas Battle Whine: “18, 19, and 20-year-old Texans pour into neighboring states to enjoy casino gambling …” These folks are adults. They earn a paycheck and they aren’t allowed to enjoy gambling – even pari-mutuel wagering – in Texas. Think of the notable military bases here in Texas, like Fort Bliss in El Paso, a block away from Sunland Park and Casino. Don’t you think these young soldiers would enjoy a day at the racetrack on their day off, versus sitting in the NCO Club listening to the same ol’ tunes from Led Zeppelin? Think about it: Lone Star Park offers free general admission on Thursdays for military personnel. Well, that would mean a whole lot more if they could entice the younger crowd. And instead of UT Alumnae Night, where everybody present graduated between 1964 and 1977, they could offer UT Night – free admission and dollar drafts with student ID. College students would have more fun betting $1 exactas and dime superfectas – but there would be a helluva handle.

Plan B requires a little creativity, a little guile. Don’t risk all your money on just one horse – this upcoming Texas Legislature session needs a good “saver” bet to aid the horse industry.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

October Occupato

Horse racing?!? Breeders' Cup?!? Kind of forgot about that stuff.

Needless to say, my usual October dalliance with impending Breeders' Cup hoopla has been momentarily voided. My time and attention is currently occupied on an unusual anomaly: Texas Rangers playing baseball in October.

Notably, this distraction has wreaked havoc somewhat in my Horse Racing World; it is a sport and/or hobby that requires constant attention and observation, otherwise I'm completely discombobulated.

There are racing stars that are a given: Zenyatta, Blame, Quality Road, Looking At Lucky. But recent Breeders' Cup chatter brings up other names that, as a fan, I should recognize and get a thrill: Harmonious, Joshua Tree, Espoir City. Who??? If I didn't take a brief moment or two this morning to read Steve Haskin or other some other turf writer, I would've have thought they were a trio of artists that played at the Kerrville Folk Festival.

Although I may be [temporarily] clueless is not the point. The issue is that to really know and love and appreciate and get really really excited about the impending Breeders' Cup, it requires serious homework and devotion by racing fans. If I'm already feeling somewhat uninformed of the star-power featured in this year's Breeders' Cup, how does the occasional fan and horseplayer feel? Will they care that this is a championship? Or will it be just a really good betting opportunity? And maybe, just maybe, this could be an example of some of the troubles that is plaguing the industry? I mean, it takes some effort to keep up with all the players, and a lot of us lazy slugs just don't wanna do it ... or we're distracted by other things.

Well, I best get crackin' on Who's Who in the Breeders' Cup or else I'll have to rely solely on the Magic Beer Bottle.

And by the way, whatever happened to Rachel Alexandra?? (Just kidding ... I'm not that clueless!)